Published in the Ocean Watch column,
Honolulu Star-Advertiser © Susan Scott

March 26, 2012

As I was examining the new book “Certainly More Than You Wanted to Know About the Fishes of the Pacific Coast, a Postmodern Experience,” it fell open to a photo of a fish I don’t know and a passage that caught my eye: “Scandinavians report that oarfish flesh sucks big time and even dogs won’t eat it. However, I imagine dogs would roll in it, big time.”

What’s an oarfish? The previous page explained, “Dude, if your fish is ribbony and has really long posterior dorsal fin rays and really, really long pelvic fin rays, and those rays are bright red, it’s, like, an oarfish.” The description goes on with etymology, size, range, life history, fishery and relationships to other fish.

I discovered this wonderful book while searching online for more information about fish of the Baja Peninsula, because our sailboat Honu is there right now. Since I’ve been reading the book, though, I want to sail it to Santa Barbara and shake the hand of the rockfish man.

That would be marine biologist Milton Love, professor and research biologist at the University of California at Santa Barbara, author of this book published last fall by Really Big Press.

I asked two marine biologist friends who did their graduate work in California whether they had heard of Milton Love. Of course, they said. Besides being well known for his sense of humor, Love is an authority on fish, particularly rockfish.

They also told me Love’s research facility in Santa Barbara, The Love Lab, is famous. I checked out the website Love Lab, and an hour later had to force myself to shut down in order to get some work done. It’s hard to resist pages such as “Sea Life Tattoos” and “Fish Pooping.”

I was fuzzy on the term postmodern, and since Love included it in his book’s title, I looked it up. Wikipedia informed me that postmodernism is “a way of approaching traditional ideas and practices in nontraditional ways.”

That’s fine because I intend to read my new fish book in a nontraditional way — in my dentist’s waiting room, the post office line and such. At 81⁄2 by 11 inches with 650 glossy pages and weighing 5 pounds, this is serious toting. No matter. CMTYWTKATFOTPCAPE goes where I go.

“What are you reading that’s so funny?” I imagine people will ask when they hear me chortling.

“My new ichthyology textbook. Hilarious.”

This text is as much fun as Gary Larson’s “Far Side” cartoons, which take up significant space on my sailboat.

I’m also enjoying the excellent photos that accompany Love’s fish entries, as well as the poems (“Romance for Jaw-challenged Fishes”), songs (music by Cole Porter, lyrics by Milton Love) and sidebars (“When herrings pass gas”).

And even if Love hadn’t mentioned the “cleverly titled book ‘All Stings Considered’” co-authored by yours truly (with husband Craig Thomas), I promise I would adore his book anyway.

At $21.91 on Amazon.com, CMTYWTKATFOTPCAPE is a must-have for all fans of fish. It’s a big, fat, scientifically sound book that zooms straight to the heart of why so many of us love marine biology: It’s really, really fun.

©2012 Susan Scott

2020-07-29T18:23:14+00:00